I've changed. I've changed so much in 2010, I feel that I'm not me anymore.
I lost the younger side of me, and I feel like crying.

Back in 2006 till 2009, namely the Secondary school period, I'll wait till the bell rings, and make last minute decisions along with e_the_l and Lynn and all to eat out and head towards bugis for lunch and after school entertainment. I loved shopping at Bugis Street and Marina then.

Now, I hate Bugis street. I dread going there and when people initiate to go there, I'll excuse myself from the trip. Okay, I don't actually hate that place, I don't mind going, to be honest. But if I get to choose, I won't.

I hate movies. I hate movie dates. I'll much rather spend that time sipping a frappé at starbucks with a book in my hand. I used to love them secretly. I had side fringe or bangs when I go to school. The more they want me to clip it up, the more I won't do it. These days, I hate having hair touching my face. I clip my fringe up every single day.

Next, I'm no longer obsessed with soft toys and all. I mean, one or two atas expensive bear is okay, but I no longer want my room to be filled with such nonsense. Just last year, just last year, I still collect them. I love it when my aunt brings me bags and bags of authentic Stitch plus toys, but these days, I can't even be bothered when she brings them.

I won't spend more than $20 on a piece of clothing. I'll buy my clothes online or at bugis, because they are a lot cheaper. Yes, I till buy clothes online now, but they are from a totally different genre. I buy dresses, chiffon tops etc, those that look more mature.

I started buying (a lot more) clothes from F21, Zara and such, when in the past, I probably own less than 10 items from each of these brands. I'll just buy tees from cotton on. Tee shirts and hardly anything else.

I can leave house without spraying any scent on me in the past. These days, I'm obsessed with perfume. On top of that, I stare and stare in the mirror to squeeze pimples last year. This year, I'm starting to look out for wrinkles.

I no longer wear slippers to school (excluding one or two occasions), I wear proper shoes. I'm starting to wear more cardi, pullovers and blazers.

I'm going to be 18. I feel myself ageing. I do know I won't get the old kiddish self back. It's sad. Because in a while more, I'm gonna be like mum. Applying layer after layers of cream that prevents anti-ageing. Life slips pass me while I'm busy with school. By the time I realise these changes, it's too late already.

I want myself back. Really.

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